You can read way more Christmas letter stories than you probably care to.. by clicking on the links at the end of the story to see the blackboard in all it’s glory, or to see a list of all the Side Quest stories.
Merry Christmas from the Highlands Ranch Fergusons- Byron, Toni, and Kyra. Sometimes Nolan shows up, so we include Nolan and girlfriend Alexis in these adventures, too.
Once upon a time, there was a blackboard. The blackboard lived on the wall of the Ferguson’s guest bathroom, and started as a place to draw holiday decorations, funny pictures, riddles, and the likes, but for 2024, the blackboard got a prompt, “The best thing that happened to me today,” which seemed to strike a chord with the family, and with some visitors. So this year’s Christmas Letter, inspired by that chalkboard (above, or with your “card”), is about a lot of what’s on the chalkboard, and a few things not on the chalkboard.
If you are reading this on the mychristmasletters.com website there are even more Christmas letter stories to “drill in on.” Click on one of the yellow links above depending on your device.. and then click highlights points on the chalkboard, or links on the 2024 Extras post page. You’ll figure it out.
Early in March, Toni and Byron visited son Nolan and girlfriend Alexis at the Philadelphia-adjacent town-house they purchased (with roommate Jamie) last year. Alexis and Nolan played excellent hosts to the “parents,” visiting the sites; an Amish market, the Philly Art Museum, a cheese-steak place, and a helicopter museum. While Byron and Toni enjoyed the sights, Byron enjoyed more—leaving his dirty dishes in the sink, turning the heat up to 80, leaving lights on, taking long luxurious HOT showers, and otherwise finding creative ways to payback Nolan for his childhood lack of fiscal responsibility. Byron gleefully watched as Nolan ran about the house turning off lights that had been turned on, thermostats that were too high, and making sure the dishwasher was full before running. Byron wonder’s if he’ll ever find that 100w bulb he left on in the crawlspace.
The Ferguson’s weren’t done with the east coast even if it was done with them. Toni grew up in upstate NY, has a friend in upstate NY, and loves to visit upstate NY. Driving our rental “Toni’s Joy” an EV Jeep, Toni gleefully ferried all to Binghamton, NY for Italian lunch with Robin, Ron, their kids and some of their families. The upstate gang laughed and carried on, reminiscing, threating to reminisce, and catching up before finally parting again, hopefully for a shorter time. Finally, before leaving for good, Toni insisted on hitting all the old haunts. Toni stopped for both State Fair Spiedies, and some Nirchi’s Pizza, delicacies she grew up on.
Before getting Nolan and Alexis back to their home and continuing the adventure, Byron insisted on stopping at Thorpe, PA to visit Jim Thorpe’s grave and monument. Byron, who had recently heard a history of Jim Thorpe found the whole store fascinating– particularly the part where a city, hoping to drive tourism, where Jim Thorpe had never even visited somehow managed to convince / pay some surviving members of Jim Thorpe’s family to let their town be his final internment, much to the chagrin of other members of the family. Byron’s kids will probably be fighting it out over an old coin collection and a box of Jughead comics.
After another night’s stay at Corke House, Byron and Toni said their goodbyes to Nolan and Alexis, likewise said goodbye to their rental Jeep, and hopped a train to New York City- home of that other salsa.
Toni, Kyra, Nolan, and Alexis saw “Sleep No More,” an immersive theater experience on a previous trip, and all gave it thumbs up as unique and odd and indescribable. Toni had been dying to go back and take Byron this time.
Toni took Byron to Sleep No More on their first night in town. The production is a mash-up of Hamlet and various Hitchcock films like “Rebecca.” The entire show is told through dance and music with no words spoken. The audience, wearing masks, can follow any of the actors through out a 50000 sq. ft. or so warehouse made up to look like a hotel, and with “sets” spanning complete floors across 5 different floors. Actors occasionally split off the odd audience member to ask or tell them something.. but it very much feels like you, as part of the story are dead and that the only time a cast member “sees” you, is immediately following their own demise. Weird enough for you? The show continues to run into 2025, but continues to billboard the show is closing soon, so make those plans soon, we know you’re dying to go!
Slightly less weird, depending on your point of view, the Fergusons also ate at a deli, visited Rockefeller center, attended tapings of The Drew Barrymore, and Stephen Cobert shows, and even stopped at the world famous magic shop, Tannens. No one was naked at any of the other events, though, so Byron has to give the highlight award to “Sleep No More.”
People are, unsurprisingly, starting to figure out from these Christmas letters that Toni is kinda fun to hang out with. In fact, it’s starting to become embarrassing how many friends and family, when in town, stop to visit Toni at her work before coming to the house to see everyone. This year alone, she had surprise visits from the entire Wall family, from family friends the Mustillo’s, and not least of all, GUY FIERI. “Really, Guy? Really?” shouted Byron to know one in particular. Guy Fieri, flamboyant host of a small empire of cooking shows, owner of various restaurants, and it would appear, fervent admirer of MyChristmasLetters.COM, just couldn’t help himself and stopped in to visit Toni this year. He may or may not have been there to try and talk Toni’s company into buying some of his and Sammy Hagar’s tequila, too, but obviously was mostly there to see Toni. It goes without saying that no one stopped and visited Byron at his work this year, including Guy Fieri.
While there’s a ton more that we did this year- you’ll have to check to visit the website and check out the “links.” to read about them. We’ll close out this year’s Christmas Letter with the other big trip we took this year, a trip where we somewhat unintentionally visited 5 countries in only 10 days.
At some point, on a visit of Byron’s sister Diane, Diane and Toni began talking (as they do.) The two began scheming about a possible trip together while Byron, blissfully unaware, watched cat videos on his phone. By the time Byron had scrolled dangerously into ugly hairless cats, the two had booked flights, a room, three excursions and a partridge in a pear tree.
The plan, as explained to Byron, involved traveling to Barcelona, Spain. Byron, who once knew some Spanish, immediately began practicing for the trip by thanking his sister who regularly uses Spanish in her job.
“Mucho. Grass-i-aas, Diana. Me llama la pup-a-taco. Mucho, uh, fun, how do you say fun, nosotros will have- what’s the future tense of will have?” said Byron.
Diane just laughed. “Wow your Spanish is bad.”
Byron, hurt but undeterred, started studying for the trip that was more than 400 days out. Using the phone app DuoLingo every day for more than a year, he improved his Spanish just enough to understand the cab driver who told him in perfect Spanish, “Your sister’s Spanish is a lot better than yours.” With a ranking of A2 “beginner conversational Spanish,” Byron lacked sufficient vocabulary to respond to the driver how he really wanted to, which probably saved him spending time in a Spanish prison where he would have had more time to work on his Spanish.
The best part of a trip with Diane is her 1K status with United. The only thing better than having your own frequent flyer miles is having a sister with frequent flyer miles. Diane, using her miles, gifted Byron and Toni their tickets to Spain, and later even our hotel. Before you ask, Diane is not available for adoption, marriage, or royal family alliances. Byron is, at least according to Byron, Diane’s favorite brother. Byron remains well aware that his standing is extremely tenuous, however, and refuses to risk that she might be bought, bribed, or friended by one of the recipients of the Christmas newsletter, and will, therefore, not provide her address, email, phone number, or other means of contact. DON’T ASK, AIN’T HAPPENIN’.
Byron, Toni, Diane, and her hubby Rick, stayed in Sitge, a small beach town outside of Barcelona. The four traveled daily from Sitge, touring Barcelona, medieval cities in France and Spain, La Sagrade Familia Cathedra, a winery in the hills of Spain, and the odd border country of Andorra. (That’s only 3 countries for those of you counting at home.)
After a week, Rick and Diane returned to the US. We completely understood. Someone needs to work and travel so there are more frequent flyer miles. Byron and Toni, eager to add another stamp to the passport, decided to stretch the trip out a bit and visit Lisbon, Portugal (that’s 4!). Lisbon, the Portugal equivalent of San Francisco, is hilly. Very hilly. The two hiked the hills to see a castle, eat tiny egg custards and a “Porto” croissant which Anthony Bourdain declared was what French croissants want to be when they grow up. We agree. Toni likes egg custards and croissants, but not hills.
After a few days in Lisbon, returning back to the US turned out to be a challenge. Our flight, cancelled for mechanical problems, proved difficult to rebook. Contacting our favorite travel agent.. yep Diane, finally got us a flight the next day to London (Wait! That’s 5!), and the day following to Denver. After a long day of travel to London’s Heathrow Airport, Toni and Byron took automated pods to their hotel, grabbed fish and chips from the hotel bar, and called it a night.
The next day, Toni and Byron arrived at the airport to find that the two, courtesy of Diane’s miles again, found they’d been upgraded to first class for the long trip home. Did we mention that first class on these international flights have little sleepers? Not bragging, just providing information. Again, no you can’t adopt Diane.
One last plug- go to the web site, click some links, read some other stories. Or just enjoy this condensed excerpt for what it is. Thank you for reading, thank you for clicking.
You can read way more Christmas letter stories than you probably care to.. by clicking on the link below, and then clicking on phrases on the “Big Chalkboard,” or if you’re on a phone, click on the listed articles.
Click Here if your on a computer to see the blackboard and click on the stories.
Click Here if you’re on a phone to see the list of the stories.
We wish you and yours a very Merry Christmas from us!
Byron, Toni, Kyra, Nolan, Alexis, and Penny the Wonder Dog.